kz
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Registered: 9th Aug 02
Location: Southend, Essex Drives: Mini Cooper S
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I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the chocolate as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.
Taking two chocolates between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them breaks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern chocolate and snack-food world.
Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the chocolate extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Dundee Road, Slough, Berks, along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
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Lynny
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Registered: 3rd Jan 03
Location: oop north! Where people talk properly
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But surely if a strong one gets through 5 or 6 rounds, it'll be weakened, so may be beaten by a newcomer when it was infact, originally stronger? So infact, you could end up breeding off a quite weak chocolate!
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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Copy and pasted from?
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Roffo
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Registered: 17th Feb 07
Location: Weymouth
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A well summerised hypothisis, but have you considered undertaking these experiments in different envioroments, including extreme heat and wild blizzards. my methods derive from that of the berkshire(c) M&M experiments 1979, which in summary, described the red M&Ms as stronger competiors in serious heat, whereas yellows tend to become more powerful during prolonged exposure to -17degrees.
in conclusion to each test the winning m&m would be sent back to the 'creators' to be studied and developed into an even more powerful subject.
thankyou for your time-
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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Roffo
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Registered: 17th Feb 07
Location: Weymouth
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do you not follow this cosmo?
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sumner2k3
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Registered: 12th Jan 06
Location: South Wales Drives: Clio 172
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i wonder how many people are going to try this next time they buy some m&ms lol or how many people are going to go out and buy some just to try it lol makes me want to buy some to give it a go
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micra_pete
Premium Member
Registered: 23rd Apr 03
Location: West Yorkshire
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row row fight the powah
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Lynny
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Registered: 3rd Jan 03
Location: oop north! Where people talk properly
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quote: Originally posted by sumner2k3
i wonder how many people are going to try this next time they buy some m&ms lol or how many people are going to go out and buy some just to try it lol makes me want to buy some to give it a go
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MoesTavern
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Registered: 19th Jul 07
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what the fuck
do you have nowt better to do with your life
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Rich H
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Registered: 26th Oct 05
Location: West Sussex Drives: E46 M3
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WTF
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micra_pete
Premium Member
Registered: 23rd Apr 03
Location: West Yorkshire
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out of context this isn't funny, in context it was possibly one of the funniest things I have ever read.
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Roffo
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Registered: 17th Feb 07
Location: Weymouth
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quote: Originally posted by MoesTavern
what the fuck
do you have nowt better to do with your life
no
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alan-g-w
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Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
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I think some people need to take their noses out of the glue.
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Scotty_B
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Registered: 11th Jun 03
Location: East Kilbride
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Does the winner swap sides during rounds?
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Scotty_B
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Registered: 11th Jun 03
Location: East Kilbride
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I'll fight you M&M with a Skittle.
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