AlexSXI
Member
Registered: 10th Jan 08
Location: Colchester, Essex
User status: Offline
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Saw this on Facebook, probably not true, but some of them are funny anyway...
https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc1/s403x403/262571_451143391645075_459174753_n.jpg
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Walmart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Walmart:
Dear Mrs. Woolf,
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Woolf, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras":
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of chips.
6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' Emergency Medics were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the Staff passed out.
 
[Edited on 22-08-2013 by AlexSXI]
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baza31
Member
Registered: 19th Apr 03
Location: yorkshire
User status: Offline
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Bart
Member
Registered: 19th Aug 02
Location: Midsomer Norton, Bristol Avon
User status: Offline
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I think this one was around before the Internet itself
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mattant
Member
Registered: 19th Jun 10
Location: South Yorkshire
User status: Offline
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That is so old, I remember it from around 2003 and it was probably around even before then
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GB123
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Nov 11
Location: Kent
User status: Offline
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Always surprises me that there are still people that haven't seen it before
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sc0ott
Member
Registered: 16th Feb 09
User status: Offline
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Ive never seen it before
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GB123
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Nov 11
Location: Kent
User status: Offline
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I'm surprised
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Bart
Member
Registered: 19th Aug 02
Location: Midsomer Norton, Bristol Avon
User status: Offline
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Bit like the baby seat at the side of the road, that's doing the rounds again on FB 
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Lee_fr200
Member
Registered: 8th May 11
Location: West Yorkshire
User status: Offline
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I've not seen this but a good chuckle anyways
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SVM 286
Member
Registered: 13th Feb 05
Location: pain
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by sc0ott
Ive never seen it before
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Daniel_Corsa
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Apr 04
Location: Wigton, Cumbria
User status: Offline
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Got to love Wal-Mart
April '06' Corsasport Feature Car  | Aug '08' Total Vauxhall Feature Car | Spring '09' Fast Car Feature Car
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Ronson
Member
Registered: 6th Dec 10
User status: Offline
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quote:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the Staff passed out.
quote:
One of the Staff passed out.
Who would pass out at that? Obviously its fake.
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