Ben G
Member
Registered: 12th Jan 07
Location: Essex
User status: Offline
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Thats exactly what it was like with me john, except I earn over double what she earns and she kept spending ''my'' money to go shopping.
This meant that I wasn't able to save up for things I wanted to buy.
Once I changed how we pay the bills, she can still go shopping but watches what she spends, rather than thinking she can go out and buy stuff as if money is no object.
I'm also able to see exactly where my money is going and can save up a hell of a lot more.
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Kyle T
Premium Member
Registered: 11th Sep 04
Location: Selby, North Yorkshire
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by A2H GO
The Mrs hardly ever buys anything of any significent expense
This is my problem. I'm the breadwinner, but my issue with us pooling "spending money" is that I'd feel guilty as hell blowing money all over the place because she genuinely is not a big spender.
Having the money split means that I don't GAF what she does with hers, and I know I can spend whatever I want of mine. If she wants to pool hers up and put it back into (joint) savings, good for her - but I won't talk her into it. Likewise when postman arrives with a set of coilovers, I don't have to justify why we can't go out for a curry with friends at the weekend or whatever, because those funds are pre-allocated.
Not lack of trust, it just makes things a bit more guilt-free for me.
Lotus Elise 111R
Impreza WRX STi
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Graham88
Member
Registered: 16th Apr 07
Location: South East Kent Drives: E46 M3
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Robin
quote:
Originally posted by Graham88
It's not lack of trust at all Robin, it's the fact that we have our own individual amounts of money left after everything necessary is paid. Once that's gone it's gone. If it was all in 1 pot it would be hard to judge and unfair IMO.
Unfair? Hard to judge?
I really don't get this.
She earns her money, I earn mine…if I've worked 50 hours overtime this month why should she suddenly see a bigger pot of money than normal and think she can get away with buying that bag she wants that she can't afford on her salary.
Call it lack of trust or whatever you want, but I earn my money, she earns hers, if she genuinely wants something and I can see that then I may lend/give her the money, but I'm not gonna let her sponge off me nor would I do the same if it was the other way around.
I can't grasp putting it all into 1 pot, you can't grasp keeping our money separate, it's just different ways of doing things. I just think my way is fair and she thinks so too
And also someone mentioned about the modifying car thing, some mods I've bought have been silly money and I know it, so if she saw a big chunk of money missing out of a pot she might feel that her money is being spent on my car, which wouldn't be fair. So to know I can afford it I use my own wages and eat bread for the rest of the month, simples
[Edited on 09-11-2013 by Graham88]
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VrsTurbo
Premium Member
Registered: 8th Jun 10
User status: Offline
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If my misses knew the amount i spend on the megane she wouldn't be happy....
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