Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
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I've just got off the phone to my ex girlfiend now, been speaking to her a bit lately, but the point is.
When we were together we never went out 2gether n stuff she was always out with work, one day I found texts on her phone off this nob from her work, let it go (as she was a very good liar) then she went all cagey n that always having her phone off etc when i was with her, and found out she got in at 7am on a weeknight once when she told me it was 2am etc.
6 months down the line and I still speak to her (fuck knows why- maybe i'm a sucker for getting treated bad) she fucked my head up several times since we split up, but the jist of it is we broke up because she had an abortion for several reasons, anyway after 2 weeks of being broke up (after 2 1/2 yrs 2gether) she gets with this nob who was texting her etc.
She rang me up last tuesday sounding all nervous n scared, she'd been beaen up by him because apparantly some lad had text her.
So she's crying and shit saying how upset she is, then since the weekend she's called me a few times and i've dropped into conversation about the situation and she says it's her life, she wishes everyoine would stop going on at her, she'll make her own mistakes.
I've told her she'd be stupid to go back to him because I still care about her loads n don't want to see her getting into an abusive relationship 
I think hearing her sounding vulnerouble (sp) I am starting to feel repsponsible for her. I don't want to detach myself from her totally but do you's think it's the only way or can we stay talking to eachother just wana move on now
Very sorry to rant it's doing my head in tho.
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sassyminx
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Registered: 10th Jan 04
Location: Hartlepool Drives: Cossie
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well obv u still got feelings for her, but if she has lied to u before in such a way maybe she sayin this to get a reaction and or sympathy from u .
wud u get back wit her or not?
sounds harsh but either detach yrself from her or tell her how u feel about her
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
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quote:
Originally posted by sassyminx
well obv u still got feelings for her, but if she has lied to u before in such a way maybe she sayin this to get a reaction and or sympathy from u .
wud u get back wit her or not?
sounds harsh but either detach yrself from her or tell her how u feel about her
Nah I wouldn't get bk with her as I really know it couldn't go anywhere and we were unhappy at the end of our relationship. I know she plays me for a fool but I can't help worrying about her for some reason (first proper love n all that), but I don't want to stop talking to her totally maybe i'm just trying to convince myself that I should tho
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Shelly
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Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
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I think Mike feels the same about me.
He thinks I am a fucked in the head slapper sometimes.
He said he feels responsible for me sometimes.
[Edited on 08-09-2004 by Shelly]
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
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quote:
Originally posted by Tom
Nah I wouldn't get bk with her as I really know it couldn't go anywhere and we were unhappy at the end of our relationship. I know she plays me for a fool but I can't help worrying about her for some reason (first proper love n all that), but I don't want to stop talking to her totally maybe i'm just trying to convince myself that I should tho
Tom, people change do you not fancy giving her another chance to prove she has or wants to change?
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LoudandProud
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Registered: 12th Jan 01
Location: Stanway, Essex
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Walk away mate it sounds harsh and im the same but eventually you have to realise
A: Your not her boyfriend/husband/lesbian lover
B: Your not her father
and then you will move on, she has to take responsibility for herself or you will always have to do this, especially if you know it wouldnt go anywhere.
[Edited on 08-09-2004 by LoudandProud]
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turbodreams
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Registered: 22nd Jul 04
Location: East Dunbartonshire
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quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
quote:
Originally posted by Tom
Nah I wouldn't get bk with her as I really know it couldn't go anywhere and we were unhappy at the end of our relationship. I know she plays me for a fool but I can't help worrying about her for some reason (first proper love n all that), but I don't want to stop talking to her totally maybe i'm just trying to convince myself that I should tho
Tom, people change do you not fancy giving her another chance to prove she has or wants to change?
Im Sorry People do Not Change in fairness people try but you are what you make yourself deep Down your true colours show in relationships. you cant change that
[Edited on 08-09-2004 by turbodreams]
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
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Thanks peeps,
shelly she hasn't changed she proves that everytime we talk - I know when she's holding something back, and not for any particular reason I just don't think she's capabale of telling me the full truth anymore not even sure what she thinks when she thinks of me now (probably 'shoulder to cry on'  cos when I wana talk to her about stuff she doesn't wana know and always turns the conversation about herself).
Loud & Proud, I know that's what i should do, just that it's hard init
Silly hoe, i'm gonna try n not speak to her, we did this for weeks when we first broke up then she started ringin me every other day
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rstrich
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Registered: 2nd Jun 04
Location: Hartlepool now :D
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quote:
Originally posted by Tom
just that it's hard init
It's not easy but it's for your own good
quote:
i'm gonna try n not speak to her
sounds like the best plan to me mate.
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purple_corsa_gls
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Registered: 25th May 04
Location: Near Sunderland
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Tell her that yif she's going to stand by this twat then you're not going to be around for her. Its harsh, but it sounds like what she needs. just say you cant just stand by and watch someone take her for a mug, and abuse her.
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
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I'm the type of person to give someone that 2nd chance and prove themselves. And I forgive easily... maybe thats why I get hurt alot, but it's me isnt it.
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turbodreams
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Registered: 22nd Jul 04
Location: East Dunbartonshire
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quote:
Originally posted by purple_corsa_gls
Tell her that yif she's going to stand by this twat then you're not going to be around for her. Its harsh, but it sounds like what she needs. just say you cant just stand by and watch someone take her for a mug, and abuse her.
But She Took Him for a mug.i no its hard to not care but you have to. you cant let her no your worried no matter how much this might be stressin you out let it go you treated her well looked after her etc and she left you for some faggot that hits women.
serves her right as for the fag thats hittin her.
what goes around comes around
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
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Ooh done it  top was off her, bottom one off me. never said that to her b4 
Her : i know that people are concerned about me & i know that you are & i am greatfull for that i only told you what happened coz i wanted to. & i dont want you to throw it in my face all the time like you do coz i just wanna forget about it & i dont wanna bring it up anymore.
& i am gonna be ok i know what im doing ive thought about loads of things the past few days & as me Mum & everyone else keeps telling me im old enough to make my own mind up & make my own mistakes, & if i get back with COCKHEAD then its up to me not anyone else, & if you & other people think im stupid then you think that but at the end of the day as you said im gonna do what ever i want.
me: I haven't thrown anything in your face, you always think that's what i'm doing but i'm just concerned about you.
If you get back with him (which it sounds like u've decided) then I don't want to speak to you anymore (i'm not being a nob) I think it's for the best I don't wana be the cause of that happening to you and don't want to be the doormat if it all goes wrong again, I need to think about myself now and not be worrying about you & to be honest it fuk5 my head up everytime I speak to you and feel like you're holding sh1t back from me.
Hope u understand what i'm saying, I still care about you loads n that but it aint gonna work me listening to your problems about lads etc cos' that's all it is when we speak - i've realised that lately it's never about how I am.
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by turbodreams
quote:
Originally posted by purple_corsa_gls
Tell her that yif she's going to stand by this twat then you're not going to be around for her. Its harsh, but it sounds like what she needs. just say you cant just stand by and watch someone take her for a mug, and abuse her.
But She Took Him for a mug.i no its hard to not care but you have to. you cant let her no your worried no matter how much this might be stressin you out let it go you treated her well looked after her etc and she left you for some faggot that hits women.
serves her right as for the fag thats hittin her.
what goes around comes around
Wish I was like u  just told her that below n am gonna stick to it 
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Half Pint
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Registered: 25th Mar 02
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The directions she takes and the decisions she makes are not your doing and if she decides to stay with a bloke who beats her or sleeps around then she should not come to you for help when it all goes wrong.
It fucks your head up even more, i've had all this and it totally fucked with my head for over a year, even fucked up a relationship i was having as she would always makew me feel responsible for things that happened to her, now she is in a relationship and guess what i don't hear from her now (blessing in disguise).
Give her the ultimatum (sp), either she wants to be with you or don't, if she don't then she can G.T.F !
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sassyminx
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Registered: 10th Jan 04
Location: Hartlepool Drives: Cossie
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quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
I'm the type of person to give someone that 2nd chance and prove themselves. And I forgive easily... maybe thats why I get hurt alot, but it's me isnt it.
i used to be like that and ive slowly learned it does u more harm than good
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by rstrich
quote:
Originally posted by Tom
just that it's hard init
It's not easy but it's for your own good
quote:
i'm gonna try n not speak to her
sounds like the best plan to me mate.
Yesh
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by sassyminx
quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
I'm the type of person to give someone that 2nd chance and prove themselves. And I forgive easily... maybe thats why I get hurt alot, but it's me isnt it.
i used to be like that and ive slowly learned it does u more harm than good
I will learn one day
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Half Pint
The directions she takes and the decisions she makes are not your doing and if she decides to stay with a bloke who beats her or sleeps around then she should not come to you for help when it all goes wrong.
It fucks your head up even more, i've had all this and it totally fucked with my head for over a year, even fucked up a relationship i was having as she would always makew me feel responsible for things that happened to her, now she is in a relationship and guess what i don't hear from her now (blessing in disguise).
Give her the ultimatum (sp), either she wants to be with you or don't, if she don't then she can G.T.F !
But it's what she knows init, but as my email above says i don't want it to be like that, so I will stick to not speaking to her.
IO don't even know why i put 'if u get bk with him I don't wana speak to you' I think I just meant 'I don't wana speak to you'.
& I certainley don't want her back, I think I need to 4get about her on my own, and i'm in need of a full blown week long relationship and then i'll be sound I reckon
Thanks dudes
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turbodreams
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Registered: 22nd Jul 04
Location: East Dunbartonshire
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quote:
Originally posted by Tom
Ooh done it top was off her, bottom one off me. never said that to her b4
Her : i know that people are concerned about me & i know that you are & i am greatfull for that i only told you what happened coz i wanted to. & i dont want you to throw it in my face all the time like you do coz i just wanna forget about it & i dont wanna bring it up anymore.
& i am gonna be ok i know what im doing ive thought about loads of things the past few days & as me Mum & everyone else keeps telling me im old enough to make my own mind up & make my own mistakes, & if i get back with COCKHEAD then its up to me not anyone else, & if you & other people think im stupid then you think that but at the end of the day as you said im gonna do what ever i want.
me: I haven't thrown anything in your face, you always think that's what i'm doing but i'm just concerned about you.
If you get back with him (which it sounds like u've decided) then I don't want to speak to you anymore (i'm not being a nob) I think it's for the best I don't wana be the cause of that happening to you and don't want to be the doormat if it all goes wrong again, I need to think about myself now and not be worrying about you & to be honest it fuk5 my head up everytime I speak to you and feel like you're holding sh1t back from me.
Hope u understand what i'm saying, I still care about you loads n that but it aint gonna work me listening to your problems about lads etc cos' that's all it is when we speak - i've realised that lately it's never about how I am.
Clearly She Thinks Its her against the world.Personally i think she needs to Grow up.people are makin the effort and she is the one throwin it back in thier faces.
Dont Worry About it Let Her Burn Her Bridges.As i Said Its Hard for you noing this is goin on.but you have to forget about it mate.
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big eck
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Registered: 20th Apr 03
Location: Tullibody. Drives - Audi B8 S4 & Fiesta Zetec-S
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It sounds like hse took the total piss right out of you mate and you let her off loads of times, now that shes done the same thing to this lad hes not prepared to put up with it hes (maybe) given her a slap, shes made her bed mate, let her lie in it
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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Yes indeed I reckon i'll be sound if I don't speak to her, thinking about it, I was fine about what she was doing when I didn't know, so if not speaking to her is the way it has to be then that's what i'm gonna do.
Sorry if any1 thinks i'm sad posting it on here but just needed telling I think
just need to go out n pull some hoes this weekend
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Half Pint
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Registered: 25th Mar 02
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not sad, just getting it outta your system and getting other ppl's opinions too !
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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Cheers tony love nah seriously
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Dom
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Registered: 13th Sep 03
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quote:
Originally posted by sassyminx
quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
I'm the type of person to give someone that 2nd chance and prove themselves. And I forgive easily... maybe thats why I get hurt alot, but it's me isnt it.
i used to be like that and ive slowly learned it does u more harm than good
aye, i can second this, more chances you give them, the more pain you suffer in the long run. I always stuck to the "3 strikes and you out" thing, but ive learnt that if im with someone and they cheat on me/do something unfaithful, then i tell em where to go and leave it - since it will never be the same as before
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