Fad
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Registered: 1st Feb 01
Location: Dartford Kent Drives: 330cd
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quote:
Originally posted by VXR
Been with my Missis nearly 10 years.
Planned to have kids before we were 30, but thats been put off till before we're 35.
The thought of you having kids its just scary
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stubs
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Registered: 30th Jun 02
Location: Bolton
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quote:
Originally posted by VXR
quote:
Originally posted by a_j_mair
Do you not think 35 is quite old though??
you will be 50 by the time they are 15
tbh I don't think 50 is that old, and theorectically i'll be older, better wage, house paid off, so can give my child/ren a better life than I had.
It is quite old, but fairly common down south due to so many career minded people working in the city and around local areas. I've know quite a few older parents as I was growing up.
Its a good point, you can also say having children young also enables you to enjoy your life when your older, but for us, we wanted to enjoy our life whilst young, going away, have nice holidays, get a house, have a good foundation.
Theres still time for us as well when we're retired. But it totally depends how you want to run your own life really 
I suppose living down south makes things different.. My brother & his family still enjoy nice holidays away, lovely big house Stockton Heath, still dine out and go out to party etc.. they even spent £50k+ on their winter wedding this time last year (not looking forward to trying to match that one!  ) I suppose living down south would make things different for them
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
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My parents were married at 21. Divorced after 20 years, and the worst part is watching how it can destroy 1 of your parents totally, as the other one WAS their life. It ruined my late teens, and I can't imagine what it can do to a young child, so although not a certain it;ll never happen (you can't predict the future), we'll do our best for it and get the basis for it not to happen.
Hence why after nearly 10 years I only recently proposed.
By my life, I mean being able to buy nice toys, tv's, material items, my bike  ....
At the moment, i can enjoy my ride, take maybe risks I shouldn't. Whilst it would destroy my partner should I have a serious accident, she could recover in life and start again....
If I had children, I wouldn't enjoy myself so much, what if would be in my head. I couldn't afford those nice toys, the lavish expensive holidays, nice hotels, random trips away and stuff. Not for the first few years anyway.
I really want children, but i want my life first without the (sounds bad) hangups of having children in tow. Im not ready for those times yet, the middle of the night wakeups, the tantrums, the endless needs financially of a child. Im getting there, just not yet 
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a_j_mair
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Registered: 23rd Jan 04
Location: Scotland
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i am 25 well am on friday and my dad is 53
I am the youngest of 3
i often go and play golf, have a drink at the pub etc with my dad which i think is nice
I also work with him which sometimes is not so great but hopefully it will allow me to slowly take some presure off him when he starts to be able to let go
Allows him to go on 2 or 3 holidays a year
play golf on a friday etc as i am now in the office to look after things
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
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quote:
Originally posted by Fad
The thought of you having kids its just scary
No, its the b0llox, your wait till you see my boy leading the WSB championship, or doing a Lewis Hamilton  (if they want to go down that route of course, of which i'll give the upmost support and perswasion )
and tbh, you don't really know me these days. Im still opinionated, but very very much a different person that you once knew.
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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I fire blanks
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
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quote:
Originally posted by stubs
I suppose living down south makes things different.. My brother & his family still enjoy nice holidays away, lovely big house Stockton Heath, still dine out and go out to party etc.. they even spent £50k+ on their winter wedding this time last year (not looking forward to trying to match that one! ) I suppose living down south would make things different for them
I really don't earn that much anymore after taking a different job a few years back. Hopefully that is going to change again though.
Im stating no more than £20k on ours, not including honeymoon, but thats already looking like a deminishing thought with what shes got planned
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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As for a wedding Im paying for a week in vegas & 2 chinese elvis's as witnesses.
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a_j_mair
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Registered: 23rd Jan 04
Location: Scotland
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quote:
Originally posted by VXR
By my life, I mean being able to buy nice toys, tv's, material items, my bike ....
Is funny you should say that a child and family will reap far more rewards from being time rich and money poor
A child will happily play with the cardboard box that the tv came in and will enjoy it far more the more time you can spend with them 
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micra_pete
Premium Member
Registered: 23rd Apr 03
Location: West Yorkshire
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quote:
Originally posted by a_j_mair
i was seeing the missus for 3 or 4 months before she fell pregnant, had known each other for 18 months or so before that
wasnt planned but was best thing to ever happen
we bought a house when she was 3 months gone, daughter was 1 last friday
best thing in the world
Alot of people want to wait untill they are ready etc etc
Having a stable income and family home etc yes you can get ready for that but i dont know if it is something i would personally ever have been ready for emotionaly with the complete change in life style etc
I would like another sooner rather than later so i am young enough to be able to enjoy time with them
A very alike story.
Know a girl for a couple of years, started going out, 10 months she fell pregnant, I was 19 she was 20.
My sons just turned 7. Without him I wouldn't have had the great job that I have, the nice house in a great area or the lifestyle I do, it really made me knuckle down as I didn't want to be a 'typical teenage / young parent', Alisons the same.
I don't regret being a young parent for a second personally, I know 100% I wouldn't be in the situation I am now, probably still dossing it of or in jail.
The only thing I have missed is my mates (Made a choice to be with my lad rather than mates) and not having much for myself as everything I earned for a good while went on him.
Plus when my son is 20, I'll only be 40, which can only be a good thing, i'd hate to be that age with a young child.
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JadeM
Premium Member
Registered: 9th Feb 06
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
I fire blanks
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
As for a wedding Im paying for a week in vegas & 2 chinese elvis's as witnesses.
Great, I've got a lot to look forward to then
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Fad
Member
Registered: 1st Feb 01
Location: Dartford Kent Drives: 330cd
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by VXR
quote:
Originally posted by Fad
The thought of you having kids its just scary
No, its the b0llox, your wait till you see my boy leading the WSB championship, or doing a Lewis Hamilton (if they want to go down that route of course, of which i'll give the upmost support and perswasion )
and tbh, you don't really know me these days. Im still opinionated, but very very much a different person that you once knew.
I doubt you've changed much apart from smoking less green
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Fad
Member
Registered: 1st Feb 01
Location: Dartford Kent Drives: 330cd
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
As for a wedding Im paying for a week in vegas & 2 chinese elvis's as witnesses.
Will the the Chapel be known as Garceland
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by a_j_mair
Is funny you should say that a child and family will reap far more rewards from being time rich and money poor
A child will happily play with the cardboard box that the tv came in and will enjoy it far more the more time you can spend with them
Yup totally agree, thing is at the moment in my life, any spare time i've got (thats not with the missis, as we're inseperable), i like to spend with friends, going out on my bike, biker holidays etc...
I want to be able to give my child/ren my up-most attention as much as possible, especially during the younger years where learning is so crucial to life later on.
What can I say, i like material items, always have.
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
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quote:
Originally posted by Fad
I doubt you've changed much apart from smoking less green
Well thats where you don't know me anymore. A brief once or twice encounter in 5+ years doesn't show the full story of a man. Things change, people change. I remember you being a shy quiet do everything you mum says kinda person. Very polite, softly spoken, a little insecure even? But these days your much more outspoken, laddish, louder and more aggressive and confident.
Are you still that person?
Things change, times change, people change. I feel my friends would say im a much better person for it, Donnas noticed the change over the years, you've not been around to know.
RE weed, that doesn't change me, that just means I can wake up easier, don't get wound up as easily, and have what seems like a lot more money in my pocket 
[Edited on 07-10-2009 by VXR]
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Fad
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Registered: 1st Feb 01
Location: Dartford Kent Drives: 330cd
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I was only jessing with you you mardy mare x
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
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I know, but im just stating a point about how life changes as you grow (or not in some peoples cases (not you) ).
OT, hows that new career going anyway (not a sarcastic question either)?
[Edited on 07-10-2009 by VXR]
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Ojc
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Registered: 14th Nov 00
Location: Reading: Drives : Clio 197
User status: Offline
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I'm aiming for 35 as well as 30 is only 3 years away, fuck that I still ride around on a scooter FFS trying to bait kids on 50's into races.
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jr
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Registered: 20th May 02
Location: Kent
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quote:
Originally posted by Ojc
I'm aiming for 35 as well as 30 is only 3 years away, fuck that I still ride around on a scooter FFS trying to bait kids on 50's into races.
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jr
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Registered: 20th May 02
Location: Kent
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quote:
Originally posted by willay
i'd also like to start 'trying'
who with xx 
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
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Not you as I hear your infertile
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Baskey
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Registered: 31st May 06
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although i have my own 3 bed semi, a decent job and a g/f of 4 years. The fact my hobbies include skidding arround in hot hatchs and smoking weed probely means im not ready for kids yet
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Ojc
Member
Registered: 14th Nov 00
Location: Reading: Drives : Clio 197
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The Government would have you believe you are no longer able to conceive children as a result of smoking to much funky stuff.
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Baskey
Member
Registered: 31st May 06
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Ojc
The Government would have you believe you are no longer able to conceive children as a result of smoking to much funky stuff.
Good point, no time for sex, im to busy watching family guy and eating monster munch
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Lawrah
Premium Member
Registered: 25th Dec 04
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by jr
quote:
Originally posted by willay
i'd also like to start 'trying'
who with xx
Me... Duurrrr
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