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lostboy

Banned

Registered: 29th Jan 09
Location: Durham
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:01

quote:
Originally posted by Toby
At a recent england training session, Rooney collects the ball and dribbles round Ashley Cole,Wright Phillips, Heskey, Ferdinand and Richards. Capello shakes his head and shouts; "Cones Wayne, i said go around the fucking cones"

(I'm not a football fan)

CorsAsh

Member

Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:05

You don't need to be to get that

lostboy

Banned

Registered: 29th Jan 09
Location: Durham
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:11

I'm just slow then lol

Eck

Premium Member

Registered: 17th Apr 06
Location: Lundin Links, Fife
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:17

RACISM

Pip308

Member

Registered: 25th Oct 07
Location: Basingstoke Drives: Audi A4 Avant, Mk1 Caddy
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:28

is it unusual for 1 of my balls to be lower than the other 2?

Ollie_B

Member

Registered: 1st Jun 08
Location: North Wales/Wirral
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:40

A lad walks into the kitchen 3 hours late from school, his dad says where have you been?, boy says zoes doing homework, dad says ok. Then the son walks over to work top picks something up and says these fish cakes are lovely dad, the dad says son they're donuts, go and wash you're hands

Pip308

Member

Registered: 25th Oct 07
Location: Basingstoke Drives: Audi A4 Avant, Mk1 Caddy
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:41

a fish swims into a wall, dam...

SVM 286

Member

Registered: 13th Feb 05
Location: pain
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 17:42

quote:
Originally posted by CorsAsh
Women complain that men can't multitask, but get upset when we piss up their arses.

l15ter

Member

Registered: 1st Feb 08
Location: Berkshire
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 22:23

what do you say to a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing shes been told twice

stan_the_man

Member

Registered: 14th Feb 07
Location: Perth, Western Australia
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 22:29

Us blokes have two moods. Horny and hungry. So if you see me without an erection, make me a sandwich.

Adam-D

Member

Registered: 11th May 02
Location: Cheshire
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 22:35

lostboy

Banned

Registered: 29th Jan 09
Location: Durham
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 22:44

quote:
Originally posted by pip308
a fish swims into a wall, dam...

stan_the_man

Member

Registered: 14th Feb 07
Location: Perth, Western Australia
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 23:07

I was set upon last night by three guys down an alley. I managed to knock one out.

Not the best time for a wank but what the hell.

lostboy

Banned

Registered: 29th Jan 09
Location: Durham
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 23:10

quote:
Originally posted by stan_the_man
I was set upon last night by three guys down an alley. I managed to knock one out.

Not the best time for a wank but what the hell.

Richardhhha

Member

Registered: 29th Sep 07
Location: Croydon, Greater London
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 23:35

lol

what happens when your washing machine breaks down?

slap the woman

Gaz

Member

Registered: 24th Aug 03
Location: Widnes, Cheshire
User status: Offline

20th Nov 09 at 23:49

What do God and family incest have in common?

They both enjoy watching family members getting nailed

am4nf

Member

Registered: 27th Jul 08
Location: South Ayrshire Drives: Corsa Sport
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 00:22

jordan has went back into the jungle but this time to release harvey back into his natural habitat

Eck

Premium Member

Registered: 17th Apr 06
Location: Lundin Links, Fife
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 01:16

quote:
Originally posted by stan_the_man
I was set upon last night by three guys down an alley. I managed to knock one out.

Not the best time for a wank but what the hell.

LOL

mooney

Member

Registered: 20th Oct 05
Location: north west uk
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 04:03

Are you into casual sex, or should I dress up?

If a woman is uncomfortable while watching you wank, do you think (A). You need more time together? (B). She's a fucking prude? (C). She should've sat somewhere else on the bus?

Polce Toay Announce They Are Nvestgatng A Strng Of ID Thefts.

Graham88

Member

Registered: 16th Apr 07
Location: South East Kent Drives: E46 M3
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 04:32

quote:
Originally posted by stan_the_man
I was set upon last night by three guys down an alley. I managed to knock one out.

Not the best time for a wank but what the hell.

Corsa_Sport21

Member

Registered: 13th Apr 08
Location: Leven, Fife. Drives : 205 GTi
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 08:08

2 goldfish swimming in a tank,1 looks to the other and says.....do you know how to drive this thing.

deano87

Member

Registered: 21st Oct 06
Location: Bedfordshire Drives: Ford Fiesta
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 08:24

Did you hear about the agnostic, dyslexic insomaniac?

He layed awake at night wondering if there really was a dog.

Ste

Premium Member

Registered: 5th Mar 03
Location: Taif, Saudi Arabia
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 09:10

Tea is for mugs.

I would rather lose by a mile because i built my own car, than win by an inch because someone else built it for me.

Tomnova16

Premium Member

Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 09:14

Theres been a bust up in the biscuit tin. A bandit called rocky who was crackers, hit a penguin over the head with a club. tied him to a wagon wheel with a blue riband, kidnapped a trophy and made his breakaway in a taxi.
Police say that rocky was last seen after eight by a viscount from maryland, hobnobbing with a gingernut. Unfortunatly, they dont have a crumb of evidence, so the jammy dodger got away with it.

http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter

DC90

Member

Registered: 14th Nov 07
Location: Bedfordshire
User status: Offline

21st Nov 09 at 14:01

A dyslexic walks into a bra..

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