27th Sep 08 at 01:54

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Originally posted by 20valver

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Originally posted by LETGSI16V
Well, my car has been really sluggish ever since I bought it so after being inspired by 20valvers posts I decided it was time that I did something about it; it was time to tune the bollocks off it.

The process for this was quite simple, start with the most power sapping thing on the whole car - no, not the ashtray or the MFD but the airbox!

So, there are some obvious things that we have to do here to make sure that we get the results we are expecting. We must be very thorough in our execution, we must use the cheapest things know to man so that it is financially viable and we must throw in lots of big words in the write up so as to appear knowledgeable and make people think we have been tuning bikes for years...

So, take your standard airbox and release the clips, we are going to take it apart because Vauxhall trap the power in there from the factory. These clips are to stop it escaping.


Now we need to bin this air filter, after all it is only to catch particles of plutonium so it doesn't cause our engines to explode.


Now we can see the inside of the airbox, soon we can release all the power but this is the dangerous part because when we release the power from the airbox it will alert to power gods of our intentions.


Undeterred I carried on, however I would need the help of a true tuning god in order to make my escape from the power gods. I was in a pickle, there was no-one I could call on, I went down to see JamieD and just as I did my prayers were answered; 20valver phoned for his daily chat and offered his services. So we were all set to go, I released the tube inside the box and as soon as it came away from it's seat (luckily it had been siliconed in place so it would come apart easily ) the alarms sounded. I froze with fear, I have just obtained immeasurable knowledge and the tuning gods were approaching, from the darkness 20valver made his escape - even being composed enough to take his airbox modifying tool with him.




I sneaked out in the opposite direction, grateful of the diversion created by 20valver. The heartache of losing this knowledge was too much for one of the power gods to take, but reading some of 20valvers posts pushed him over the edge, he had no choice but turn his gun on himself and end it all...



Having escaped from the maximum security stockade, we headed for the Los Angeles underground. We are still wanted by the power gods so have to survive as tuners of misfortune.

In our secret location we carried on releasing the power from the airbox, now derestricted we were on our way.


We knew that we had to smooth the airbox to get all that lovely power but it was too dangerous to buy some filler so we had to make do with parcel tape.


The top needed some of the same. The box also needed sealing but I dropped the copper grease whilst making my escape. This was turning into a disaster until I improvised with some extra virgin olive oil.


Before;


Smoothed and sealed;


Now we had to test it, remember you test, evaluate and re-test.


A quick drive around the block showed we had loads of extra hypoglycaemic air particles going into our airbox, this is perfect - just what we want. Only problem is that all the extra air particles meant we are now running leaner. We needed to supply more fuel.

With one charcoal lump added the car noticeably improved but the time and date settings on the MFD showed that we were still not running at proper warp power. We added 1mm to the timing and still no difference to the readings.


A bit more experimentation soon found us passing through 2 and then 3 coal pieces to reach our desired result.



The car was flying now and fuelling perfectly, the only problem we had is that the door cards started to rattle, this was an indication that the air coming in wasn't wet enough. 20valver told me of his old water wetting trick, apparently as a cucumber is 90% water that would sort it - I am amazed just what you can do with a simple old airbox.

Problem again - no bastard cucumbers. Thank the lord for the red bell pepper, onion and carrot though.


A final run showed that the car would now do 128MPH, previously it only did 60. This airbox malarkey is certainly worth endangering my health for.

The finished product...

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we must throw in lots of big words in the write up so as to appear knowledgeable and make people think we have been tuning bikes for years...
1 set squish to 0.75mm to 0.97mm
2 32mm carb
3 taper port front of carb
4 open out the reed stops = more lift on reeds
5 port reed block entrance and the windows
6 use a spacer tube and filter
7 drop main inlet port down and lift up main inlet port
8 make main inlet port wider
9 drop the 2 little booster ports down the ones either side of the main inlet port
10 make the 2 little booster ports wider the ones either side of the main inlet port
11 re profile scavenger entrances
13 lift up transfer ports so they all open and close together
14 make transfer ports wider
15 match crank case mouth to scavenger entrances
16 line up back of crank case with inlet port
17 enlarge main bearing oil feed ways
18 lift up exhaust port
19 make exhaust port wider
20 use a racing spark plug and plug cap
21 run on pre mix
22 flat and polish combustion chamber in cylinder head
23 flat and polish piston crown and exhaust port if needed
24 get the squish recut to a 10 degree angle
25 profile rubber inlet manifold for size of carb
26 run a tzr piston kit
27 use more base gaskets when using a tzr piston kit
28 get top of barrel skimmed when using a tzr piston kit
29 profile the rear of the tzr piston on the inlet side
30 get big end crank pin welded this is to stop the crank twisting in the fly wheel webs
31 when using a tuned barrel you will need to change rings and pistons more
then you get reliability
32 use a fully synthetic racing oil
33 open out the inlet side of the barrel where the reed block goes then you get even more lift on the reed stops on the reed block
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