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Author Max Power raping Corsa ownerz
Jambo
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Registered: 8th Sep 01
Location: Maidenhead, Drives: VXR Arctic
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29th Sep 06 at 12:42   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Cut springs as lowering kits cost too much
gianluigi
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Registered: 9th Mar 05
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
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29th Sep 06 at 12:43   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

#...sex wee at the sight of Carbon Fiber.
#...critisise martin c for having a crap car when owning a 1997 white corsa merit.
Matt H
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Registered: 11th Sep 01
Location: South Yorkshire
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29th Sep 06 at 12:45   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Use chicken wire instead of mesh
Marc
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Registered: 11th Aug 02
Location: York
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29th Sep 06 at 12:45   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

#59 Fit a whale tail
gianluigi
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Registered: 9th Mar 05
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
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29th Sep 06 at 12:45   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:
Originally posted by Matt H
Use chicken wire instead of mesh


who did that??!
Marc
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Registered: 11th Aug 02
Location: York
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29th Sep 06 at 12:46   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Ross
Matt H
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Registered: 11th Sep 01
Location: South Yorkshire
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29th Sep 06 at 12:46   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:
Originally posted by gianluigi
quote:
Originally posted by Matt H
Use chicken wire instead of mesh


who did that??!



Vibs
gianluigi
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Registered: 9th Mar 05
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
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29th Sep 06 at 12:46   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

even better
Matt H
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Registered: 11th Sep 01
Location: South Yorkshire
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29th Sep 06 at 12:48   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Drink Carling at a cruise
Nismo
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Registered: 12th Sep 02
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29th Sep 06 at 12:48   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

and th centre exit exhaust that he kept quiet for like 2 years then at the national meet everyone found out
corsa5dr
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Registered: 12th Jan 03
Location: Bath/Bristol - Evo 4 GSR
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29th Sep 06 at 12:49   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:
Originally posted by Nismo
quote:
Originally posted by ed
I hope to god 'UK Bling' doesn't take over. There are already enough fucking crappy shit Range Rovers on the road, there are even ones with fucking chrome wheels on them round here. Shit.


a guy in my town swapped his FQ400 for a X5 of 22" spinners


Thats Jason again. God know what he's playing at, that Evo was stunning
CorsAsh
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Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
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29th Sep 06 at 12:49   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

#49 be deluded into thinking the GSi is actually quick
#50 ...then start smallblockxe.com
#51 Fit caliper covers to make it look like you have 4 pots
#52 ...and fake rear discs...
#53 Fit alloys before lowering
#54 Cut springs as lowering kits cost too much
#55 Wonder why your suspension fell out...
#56 sex wee at the sight of Carbon Fibre
#57 criticise martin c for having a crap car when owning a 1997 white corsa merit.
#58 Use chicken wire instead of mesh
#59 Fit a whale tail
#60 Claim to have a 2.0 8v that does 140mph
#61 Drink Carling at a cruise
#62 Flash your eggy breasts at a cruise
#63 Fit a twin upswept DTM in the middle of the back bumper
#64 Fit a huge dual exit in the middle of your GSi's rear bumper
Jambo
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Registered: 8th Sep 01
Location: Maidenhead, Drives: VXR Arctic
User status: Offline
29th Sep 06 at 12:51   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

eggy breasts
Robin
Premium Member

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Registered: 7th Jan 04
Location: Northants Drives: Clio 182 Cup
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29th Sep 06 at 12:52   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

post pics of your X14XE doing 127mph.
advise people not to rev over 2krpm when the engine is cold
call GTX Magnatec a marketing gimmick
think that octane booster or super unleaded makes a difference on your 1.2 8v
gianluigi
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Registered: 9th Mar 05
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
User status: Offline
29th Sep 06 at 12:54   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

#...put SRi badges on your Corsa C, because you believe it's faster than an SXi.
Steve
Premium Member

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Registered: 30th Mar 02
Location: Worcestershire Drives: Defender
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29th Sep 06 at 12:55   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

FPMSL at this list that has grown rather rapidly over lunch
gianluigi
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Registered: 9th Mar 05
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
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29th Sep 06 at 12:56   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

#..Don't let steve near your car as his breath has paint thinning charactoristics.
Steve
Premium Member

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Registered: 30th Mar 02
Location: Worcestershire Drives: Defender
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29th Sep 06 at 12:56   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

#...make a tongue shaped bonnet
#...inability to spell is a must
CorsAsh
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Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
User status: Offline
29th Sep 06 at 12:57   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

No Luigi, that's ust gonna turn into sillyness

Here's the full list upto now:

#1 Add a jet engine, flip it at 300mph
#2 Grow a ginger beard and learn to roundhouse kick stuff.
#3 Fit VTEC.
#4 fit civic lights to it regardless of how they fit
#5 put all the interior on the exterior, and have an interior like a ferrys exterior
#6 fit the 1st set of alloys you can get your hands on regardless of offset
#7 Refer to your car as your "ride" regardless to the fact that you don't actually ride a car
#8 u2u g@z
#9 Make your own in-car driving video and call it "Boys have fun"
#10 Join http://www.VAGweb.co.uk
#11 Fit a shit exhaust
#12 Make wide arches out of expanding foam
#13 ring vauxhall to get a working flux capacitor
#14 Put your back seats down to reduce weight and improve performance - Whilst fitting a rather heavy sub and amp to your car
#15 Fit a Cossie cone, just because they're so damn cool.
#16 Stick on random VXR, turbo, GSi, TypeR badges as you see fit
#17 Fit a bfo exhaust because it means big 'fuck' off and you like swearing
#18 fit a multitude of stickers even if you dont actually own anything from the companies youre promoting
#19 Fit a sock to induction system & wonder why the car doesn't work properly
#20 Attempt to fit a dump valve to your 1.2 8v, your mate did it he said it was easy
#21 Stick a cd to your horn to bling your car up that extra bit.
#22 stick tights over your headlights for that genuine tineted look
#23 Realise dumpvalves only work on turbo cars, purchase fake electric sound dump valve from ebay
#24 video yourself doing 130mph in third gear
#25 Gain 10-15% in performance for just £4.50 on ebay
#26 If you are asian, put a gold decorative tissue box on your parcel shelf
#27 Let a 16 year old girl drive and crash your car cos you want to have sex with her
#28 Fit rubstrips
#29 Lie about owning a Calibra
#30 Cover your boring grey parcel shelf with an England flag
#31 Buy a BMW 316 add m3 badges
#32 Hang CD from rear view mirror
#33 Want to own a CTR
#34 ...or a blue Impreza with Gold wheels and a Prodrive jacket
#35 Angle seat backwards
#36 Use only one hand to steer
#37 Fit leather look seat covers from Argos
#38 master the art of drifting using 2 mcdonalds tray's
#39 Get told daily that 106s are better
#40 Debadge car.....only to fit a sticker 100 times as big saying the same thing as the badge did
#41 Fit DIY tints as they are P.I.M.P
#42 fit a gsi kit and speedlines?
#43 fit a non-working roof scoop
#44 get chinese motif's all over your bonnet when you're quite clearly white
#45 Start your own online Corsa community
#46 Enquire about possible turbo conversion for 1.2 engines
#47 Buy leafblower electric supercharger from eBay
#48 Remove two HT leads so your 1.0 sounds like a Subaru
#49 be deluded into thinking the GSi is actually quick
#50 ...then start smallblockxe.com
#51 Fit caliper covers to make it look like you have 4 pots
#52 ...and fake rear discs...
#53 Fit alloys before lowering
#54 Cut springs as lowering kits cost too much
#55 Wonder why your suspension fell out...
#56 sex wee at the sight of Carbon Fibre
#57 criticise martin c for having a crap car when owning a 1997 white corsa merit.
#58 Use chicken wire instead of mesh
#59 Fit a whale tail
#60 Claim to have a 2.0 8v that does 140mph
#61 Drink Carling at a cruise
#62 Flash your eggy breasts at a cruise
#63 Fit a twin upswept DTM in the middle of the back bumper
#64 Fit a huge dual exit in the middle of your GSi's rear bumper
#65 post pics of your X14XE doing 127mph.
#66 advise people not to rev over 2krpm when the engine is cold
#67 call GTX Magnatec a marketing gimmick
#68 think that octane booster or super unleaded makes a difference on your 1.2 8v
#69 put SRi badges on your Corsa C, because you believe it's faster than an SXi
#70 make a tongue shaped bonnet
#71 inability to spell is a must
#72 make a hans solo stuck in metal in your bonnet


[Edited on 29-09-2006 by CorsAsh]
Steve
Premium Member

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Registered: 30th Mar 02
Location: Worcestershire Drives: Defender
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29th Sep 06 at 12:57   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

get that one to fuck luigi
Steve
Premium Member

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Registered: 30th Mar 02
Location: Worcestershire Drives: Defender
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29th Sep 06 at 12:58   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

LOLLSERSKATES AT 72
Edd
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Registered: 8th Nov 04
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
29th Sep 06 at 12:58   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

if you dont have foglights install some then break the switch so they never go off( even in broad daylight )
CorsAsh
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Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
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29th Sep 06 at 12:59   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

LMAO Edd
Edd
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Registered: 8th Nov 04
Location: Glasgow
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29th Sep 06 at 13:00   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

"strip" your car of all needless electrical wiring even though you have no experience of auto electrics
Robin
Premium Member

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Registered: 7th Jan 04
Location: Northants Drives: Clio 182 Cup
User status: Offline
29th Sep 06 at 13:00   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

wire up your fuel pump relay to the rear foglight switch.

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