SteveW
Member
Registered: 15th Jul 02
Location: Up in the clouds
User status: Offline
|
Apparently these are genuine.
Reckon we would have heard a couple of these ourselves.
N.
Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just
doesn't work. What am I doing wrong?
Tech support: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive, right?
Customer: Yeah....
Tech support: And what sort of computer are you using?
Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player
and all I get is weird noises. Listen...
Tech support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!
===============
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...
===============
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound so good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on
my desk... sorry...
===============
Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
===============
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I
try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed
it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...
===============
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.
===============
Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
===============
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another
keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work
===============
Tech support: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital
letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
===============
Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
===============
Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
===============
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my
computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
===============
Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the
circle around it?
===============
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The
man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is
working fine."
===============
And last but not least...
Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same
time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the
letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT
|
Jason Iles
Member
Registered: 19th Jun 01
Location: Bristol
User status: Offline
|
|
Carr
Member
Registered: 1st Oct 04
Location: Leicestershire (Home) Ambleside, Lakes (Uni)
User status: Offline
|
Fucking newbies 
|
Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
|
LMAO
|
leeshez
Member
Registered: 3rd May 01
Location: Great Harwood, Lancashire
User status: Offline
|
|
_Allan_
Member
Registered: 24th Mar 04
User status: Offline
|
quality 
|
Jake
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
User status: Offline
|
stupid americans
|
Pablo
Member
Registered: 3rd Feb 03
Location: Milton Keynes
User status: Offline
|
|
Rob B
Member
Registered: 8th Jan 04
Location: Area Motorsport Drives: Race EP3
User status: Offline
|
very good Steven
|
Dan B
Member
Registered: 25th Feb 01
User status: Offline
|
http://www.rinkworks.com/stupid/
LOADS more on there! 
|
Jake
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
User status: Offline
|
, just found this on the site
I worked as a computer tech for an insurance company. One day I received a call from supervisor on the sales floor.
Me: "Hello, IT."
Supervisor: "Hello?"
Me: "Hello?"
Supervisor: "Hello?"
Me: "Hello?"
The phone went dead. I put the phone down, and it rang again.
Me: "Hello, IT."
Supervisor: "Hello, did you just ring me?"
Me: "No you rang me."
Supervisor: "Did I? Oh, well, the reason I'm ringing now is because you couldn't hear me when I rang you before."
Me: "Yes I could."
Supervisor: "No you couldn't."
Me: "Yes I could."
Supervisor: "No you couldn't."
Me: "Believe me, I could."
Supervisor: "Can you hear me now?"
Me: "Yes, of course I can."
Supervisor: "Oh, that's all right then. Catch you later."
|
Adam
Member
Registered: 1st May 01
Location: Hurstbourne Tarrant
User status: Offline
|
http://chroniclesofgeorge.nanc.com/
|
