Stuckey
Member
Registered: 5th Jun 02
Location: Plumstead, Greater London
User status: Offline
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A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot
sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs.
The guy says aloud; "Jeesh. I wonder what happened to this
Parrot?"
The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective
parrot."
"Holy s**t," the guy replies. "You actually understood
and answered me!"
"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a
highly intelligent, thoroughly educated bird."
"Oh yeah?", the guy asks, "Then answer this-how do you
hang on to your perch without any feet?"
"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but
since you asked, I wrap my willie around this wooden bar like
a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers."
"Wow" says the guy, "you really can understand and
speak English, can't you!?"
"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English and I can
converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic:
politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at
ornithology.
You really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
The guy looks at the $200 price tag. "Sorry, but I just
can't afford that."
"Pssssssst" says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the
truth is, nobody wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can
probably get me for $20, just make the guy an offer!"
The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot. Weeks
go by.
The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of
humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands
everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes
"Psssssssssssst" and motions him over with one wing.
"I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but
it's about your wife and the postman."
"What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
"When the postman delivered today, your wife greeted
him at the door in a sheer black nighty and kissed him
passionately."
"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what
happened?"
"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted
up her nighty and began petting her all over" reported the
parrot.
"My God!" he exclaims. "Then what?"
"Then he lifted up the nighty, got down on his knees
and began to lick her all over, starting with her breasts and
slowly going down..."
"WELL???" demands the frantic guy, "THEN WHAT
HAPPENED?"
"Damned if I know. I got an erection and fell off my perch
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Colin
Member
Registered: 4th Apr 02
User status: Offline
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R Lee
Member
Registered: 15th Aug 03
User status: Offline
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Skinner
Member
Registered: 14th Jul 03
Location: aberdeen drives:mk4 irmscher astra on 18's
User status: Offline
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pmsl
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Dan B
Member
Registered: 25th Feb 01
User status: Offline
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FPMSL!
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Pablo
Member
Registered: 3rd Feb 03
Location: Milton Keynes
User status: Offline
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Drew
Banned
Registered: 24th Nov 01
Location: County Durham
User status: Offline
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have i heard every joke thats posted in here? 
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Stuckey
Member
Registered: 5th Jun 02
Location: Plumstead, Greater London
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Drew
have i heard every joke thats posted in here?
yes probably cos your old, or cos your a member of turbosport.co.uk
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Je11ybubb1es
Member
Registered: 11th Jun 02
Location: Milton Keynes
User status: Offline
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Drew
Banned
Registered: 24th Nov 01
Location: County Durham
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Stuckey
or cos your a member of turbosport.co.uk
nope
must be the old reason 
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Smiffie
Member
Registered: 26th Feb 04
User status: Offline
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 LMAO
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