Munchie
Member
Registered: 17th Jul 01
Location: I swap goats for mobile phones
User status: Offline
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short enough for a txt message!
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Anty
Premium Member
Registered: 19th Mar 08
Location: droitwich
User status: Offline
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you smell
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Munchie
Member
Registered: 17th Jul 01
Location: I swap goats for mobile phones
User status: Offline
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thats not very nice.
you are simply commenting on my skin colour and presuming i work in a corner shop
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CorsAsh
Member
Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
User status: Offline
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Women complain that men can't multitask, but get upset when we piss in the shower.
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Hammer
Member
Registered: 11th Feb 04
User status: Offline
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Munchie 
2 OAP's having oral sex, man says 'I can't stay down there it fucking stinks' Woman says 'Sorry that's my arthritis' 'What in your fanny'
'Nah in my arm, I can't wipe my arse'
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CorsAsh
Member
Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
User status: Offline
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DaveyLC
Member
Registered: 8th Oct 08
Location: Berkshire
User status: Offline
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Paddy takes his goldfish back to the pet shop because its got epilepsy. The shop keeper says "It looks healthy to me sir and im not sure gold fish can have epilepsy" to which paddy replies "You havent seen the fecker when you take him out of the bowl!".
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alan-g-w
Member
Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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Two nuns being raped up a quiet country lane by two big black guys. First one says 'Forgive them father, for they know not what they do'. Second one moans at the top of her voice 'OOOH THIS FUCKER DOES!'
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alan-g-w
Member
Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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Or how about... Alcohol free beer. It's like licking your sister's fanny - it tastes the same but it's just not fucking right.
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Tommy L
Member
Registered: 21st Aug 06
Location: Northampton Drives: Audi wagon
User status: Offline
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Jordan has gone back into the jungle - to look for harvey's Dad
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Marc
Member
Registered: 11th Aug 02
Location: York
User status: Offline
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Hammer
Member
Registered: 11th Feb 04
User status: Offline
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Bloke goes to the doctors claiming he's been raped by an elephant. Doctor says 'that's strange your arse is 11" wide and an elephants cock is only 3"' Bloke says 'aye I know that, but the bastard fingered me first'
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alan-g-w
Member
Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by corsa_tomtom
Jordan has gone back into the jungle - to look for harvey's Dad
Jordan has told her new fella that she wants an all white wedding...
He said 'Suits me, that wee fucker Harvey gives me the creeps..'
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lostboy
Banned
Registered: 29th Jan 09
Location: Durham
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Hammer
Bloke goes to the doctors claiming he's been raped by an elephant. Doctor says 'that's strange your arse is 11" wide and an elephants cock is only 3"' Bloke says 'aye I know that, but the bastard fingered me first'
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bigboykarl
Member
Registered: 19th May 09
Location: South Yorkshire
User status: Offline
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there was a black coffin outside my door this morning...so i gave him some lockets and told him to fuck off
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johnhara1
Member
Registered: 19th Oct 06
Location: Newcastle upon Tyne
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by corsa_tomtom
Jordan has gone back into the jungle - to look for harvey's Dad
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Anty
Premium Member
Registered: 19th Mar 08
Location: droitwich
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Munchie
thats not very nice.
you are simply commenting on my skin colour and presuming i work in a corner shop
dont you?
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bigboykarl
Member
Registered: 19th May 09
Location: South Yorkshire
User status: Offline
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I'm so disappointed with Henry.
As the years have gone by his performances have been getting worse and what happened on wednesday is the final straw.
I'm getting a Dyson tomorrow
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Corsa_Quadz
Member
Registered: 24th Feb 08
Location:
User status: Offline
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A woman in the bar says that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts.
Her husband tells her, "Hey, you don't need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery."
The lady asks, "How do I do it without surgery?"
"Just rub toilet paper between them."
Startled the lady asks, "How does that make them bigger?"
"I don't know, but it worked for your ass."
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lostboy
Banned
Registered: 29th Jan 09
Location: Durham
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by bigboykarl
I'm so disappointed with Henry.
As the years have gone by his performances have been getting worse and what happened on wednesday is the final straw.
I'm getting a Dyson tomorrow
Hang yourself for repeating that utterly SHITE joke.
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alan-g-w
Member
Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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That was meant to be a joke? I thought it was just a pointless story.
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lostboy
Banned
Registered: 29th Jan 09
Location: Durham
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by alan-g-w
That was meant to be a joke? I thought it was just a pointless story.
I assumed it was a joke, maybe it wasn't.
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alan-g-w
Member
Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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After doing a bit of digging I think it's something happening with sport. Don't get it though.
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bigboykarl
Member
Registered: 19th May 09
Location: South Yorkshire
User status: Offline
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well tonight on english tv is a preview for the 2010 world cup....in ireland there showing out of africa
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Toby
Premium Member
Registered: 29th Nov 05
User status: Offline
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At a recent england training session, Rooney collects the ball and dribbles round Ashley Cole,Wright Phillips, Heskey, Ferdinand and Richards. Capello shakes his head and shouts; "Cones Wayne, i said go around the fucking cones"
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