Limecat
Banned
Registered: 25th Jun 05
Location: The Internet
User status: Offline
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...followed through?
I was at the splitarses earlier, with her parents and thought I was being a smart arse by letting out a sneaky squeek, until it felt damp. At that point, I was a little worried, more so as I was in my sexy summer Irish linen white pants.
So, I made my excuses, vanished off to their downstairs bog and inspected the damage. It looked good, false alarm on inspecting and sniffing the arse area of my gruds. This couldn't be true, so I actually went waist down naked and inspected my pants. I had got away with it - thank fuck.
I had terrible flashbacks to the last time I farted and followed through, a few years back at the old Queens house where I pushed out the excess air, only to feel damp pooper cloth. Hmmm... Not good.
Standing up I realised I had already touched the drape on the sofa (after the gruds and the pants), so taking that off showed I had dirtied the cushion cover!?! I took that off and had touched the cushion too!?! 5 fucking layers of penetration!?!
Still, despite the bad flash backs I got to dick a Ferrari on the way home.
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Tomnova16
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
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No
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
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Tomnova16
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
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Never
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
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Ingham
Banned
Registered: 9th May 08
Location: Burnley, Lancashire
User status: Offline
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The other day, brand new white boxers, left a nice bit of chocolate for my Mum to nibble on before she chucked them in the washing machine which has now exploded (awaiting delivery of a new one). Personally I think I have super poop, destroying washing machines for breakfast.
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John
Member
Registered: 30th Jun 03
User status: Offline
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Trying too hard.
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C2RL R
Member
Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
User status: Offline
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i've had a few near misse but the only time its ever happened was last summer at work. i'd had a bad gut for days so had some time off work. the first morning i was back in i'd gone outside for a cig. smokers will know that your first cig of the day normally loosens ya shitter a bit. anyway i snook out a fart that gargled and i ended up waddling off to the bogs. luckily nobody else was there.
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Ingham
Banned
Registered: 9th May 08
Location: Burnley, Lancashire
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by John
Trying too hard.
I rest my case.
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ssj_kakarot
Member
Registered: 29th Apr 03
Location: hartlepool
User status: Offline
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no funnily enough i have never shit my self
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Tommy L
Member
Registered: 21st Aug 06
Location: Northampton Drives: Audi wagon
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Jonny Ingham
quote: Originally posted by John
Trying too hard.
[IMG]http://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj254/BigFatDonk/PICT0470.jpg[IMG]
I rest my case.
I don't think he meant you
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Jamie-C
Member
Registered: 3rd Jun 08
Location: Ballycastle
User status: Offline
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Your vinyl floor is ripped mate
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Ingham
Banned
Registered: 9th May 08
Location: Burnley, Lancashire
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Tommy L
quote: Originally posted by Jonny Ingham
quote: Originally posted by John
Trying too hard.
[IMG]http://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj254/BigFatDonk/PICT0470.jpg[IMG]
I rest my case.
I don't think he meant you
Oops. Still proof of super poop though.
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adiohead
Member
Registered: 28th Sep 01
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by ssj_kakarot
no funnily enough i have never shit my self
even as a baby?
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Ingham
Banned
Registered: 9th May 08
Location: Burnley, Lancashire
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Jamie-C
Your vinyl floor is ripped mate
Washer's fault, getting a new one Monday & washer Friday ish.
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Tomnova16
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by C2RL R
i've had a few near misse but the only time its ever happened was last summer at work. i'd had a bad gut for days so had some time off work. the first morning i was back in i'd gone outside for a cig. smokers will know that your first cig of the day normally loosens ya shitter a bit. anyway i snook out a fart that gargled and i ended up waddling off to the bogs. luckily nobody else was there.
another reason not to smoke
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
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DannyB
Premium Member
Registered: 6th Feb 08
User status: Offline
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I've been close but never full on shit in my duds.
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Limecat
Banned
Registered: 25th Jun 05
Location: The Internet
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Jonny Ingham
The other day, brand new white boxers, left a nice bit of chocolate for my Mum to nibble on before she chucked them in the washing machine which has now exploded (awaiting delivery of a new one). Personally I think I have super poop, destroying washing machines for breakfast.
You can always tell when you have had a heavy night, or been wearing the same gruds for a few days by that shid up the back.
quote: Originally posted by John
Trying too hard.
STFU you boring hater. I am sick of narrow minded, inept twats like you following me around this forum. Where are you in the tech section? Exactly, you were what I was sniffing for in my gruds. I even took some clean bog roll and wiped the gruds looking for traces of you, dirty shit-stain that you are.
You really need to get over this whole Internet username thing. You fucking bellend.
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SportBoy
Member
Registered: 5th Oct 01
Location: Retford, Nottinghamshire
User status: Offline
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couple of years ago i was having a bath and felt a fart brew .... it wasnt a fart
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Ian W
Member
Registered: 8th Nov 03
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by SportBoy
couple of years ago i was having a bath and felt a fart brew .... it wasnt a fart
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John
Member
Registered: 30th Jun 03
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by LETGSI16V
quote: Originally posted by Jonny Ingham
The other day, brand new white boxers, left a nice bit of chocolate for my Mum to nibble on before she chucked them in the washing machine which has now exploded (awaiting delivery of a new one). Personally I think I have super poop, destroying washing machines for breakfast.
You can always tell when you have had a heavy night, or been wearing the same gruds for a few days by that shid up the back.
quote: Originally posted by John
Trying too hard.
STFU you boring hater. I am sick of narrow minded, inept twats like you following me around this forum. Where are you in the tech section? Exactly, you were what I was sniffing for in my gruds. I even took some clean bog roll and wiped the gruds looking for traces of you, dirty shit-stain that you are.
You really need to get over this whole Internet username thing. You fucking bellend.
Hi mate, thanks for your time
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SportBoy
Member
Registered: 5th Oct 01
Location: Retford, Nottinghamshire
User status: Offline
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never jumped out so fast
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Ingham
Banned
Registered: 9th May 08
Location: Burnley, Lancashire
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by LETGSI16V
quote: Originally posted by Jonny Ingham
The other day, brand new white boxers, left a nice bit of chocolate for my Mum to nibble on before she chucked them in the washing machine which has now exploded (awaiting delivery of a new one). Personally I think I have super poop, destroying washing machines for breakfast.
You can always tell when you have had a heavy night, or been wearing the same gruds for a few days by that shid up the back.
Definitely, this wasn't a mere skid in the grundies though - I'm talking a mole hill. Just think it's a bit scary I enjoyed it.
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Limecat
Banned
Registered: 25th Jun 05
Location: The Internet
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by SportBoy
couple of years ago i was having a bath and felt a fart brew .... it wasnt a fart
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zrIkPmNZQE
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Jamie-C
Member
Registered: 3rd Jun 08
Location: Ballycastle
User status: Offline
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I done it once a few years ago. I took the boxers a walk and through them in the forest so my mum wouldn't see them
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DannyB
Premium Member
Registered: 6th Feb 08
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by SportBoy
never jumped out so fast
I'm not suprised, if I seen one of my own floating air biscuits creeping up to the head end id be out of that bath quicker than a jew in a shower room.
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SportBoy
Member
Registered: 5th Oct 01
Location: Retford, Nottinghamshire
User status: Offline
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looked like when a squid uses its ink but it was brown
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