richc
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Registered: 24th Mar 07
Location: Ilkeston
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Good afternoon CS
Im not usually one to blabber on the internet about personal issues but im pretty lost at the momement
Im wondering if anyone has been in this situation. Here is the story;
Ive been going out with a girl since early 2010. We have always had a very good relationship, and i dont recall any occasion where we have actually 'fell out'. We have always gone out at weekends with our own mates, and always had our own space (we didnt live in each other pockets). Because of this, i thought we had the best relationship possible because I had the best of both worlds.
Her ex was very possesive and wouldnt let her do anything, which she made a strongpoint of when we got together. This has been the basis of our relationship, which i thought made her happy, which in turn made me happy. For exmaple, Some weekends I would want to do something with her, but she had plans with friends. I would just say no problem ill see you the day after or something. We both go on holidays with friends also (i have just got back from last week ibiza and she is going to kavos soon).
Fast forward to friday and she spouts out that she doesnt feel the same anymore and feels like we are just hanging around the for the sake of it as this is what we are use to. I was totally shocked and gutted at the same time. She turned around and basically said i was never botherd about anything she did and i believe she as took it that i am not interested in our relationship. I can see where she is comming from but she couldnt be more wrong.
What makes it worse is last month we went to America together, and met her family members out there. Alot of them were arguing over 'nothing', which highlighted how we never do that which made me humble thinking our relationship is so good.
The only time she ever made a hint of not being happy was in feb last year. TBH, i could see where she was comming from as i went abit funny (not making effort to text etc) for a couple of weeks. Abit of make up sex and i thought we was sorted, and she never made a comment untill this friday where she said its over.
What do I do from here? I think she has been abit hot headed about it all and hopefully she will come round if i leave her alone. Im not stupid, and I know this is really nieve thinking she might change but ive got to have some hope???
Anyone else been in a similar situation? Im feeling pretty lost right now.
[Edited on 30-07-2012 by richc]
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willay
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Organiser: South East, National Events
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Registered: 10th Nov 02
Location: Roydon, Essex
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Tell her the above.
If she still isnt sure, then tell her that you want to be in a relationship with her but if she isn't going to commit then you aren't going to wait around.
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willay
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Organiser: South East, National Events
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Registered: 10th Nov 02
Location: Roydon, Essex
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Oh and if all else fails, kick her in the cunt and tell her she has major daddy issues.
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baza31
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Registered: 19th Apr 03
Location: yorkshire
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Thing is mate it's not one persons views that make a relationship . She's got her own views and none of us can inform you of what they are . If u find out what her views are am sure steve could possibly point you in the right direction .
Can we have a pic of her to help weigh this job up
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SetH
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Registered: 15th Jul 01
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Pay £12.50 and post in Prem, this shit does not come free blud 
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Tomnova16
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Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
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dont force the issue, if its meant to be then it will work itself out
but yes pics would help
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
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JordyCarter
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Registered: 14th Mar 10
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I do the same sometimes go in stages where i just pure cba with the texting and giving a shit lol. I would not see her for a few days and then go out together for a meal and talk about whats going on. Maybe she just wants more attention we all know females love attention
[Edited on 30-07-2012 by JordyCarter]
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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She's probably met someone else who makes her feel important and wanted and made her evaluate her cosy relationship as toxic and loveless.
Immature young girls desperately crave attention, texts every 5 minutes and a whole mannor of other nonsense sadly so i'm afraid unless she regains her marbles quickly then it's over old chap!! Just hope you've not been bladed by anyone you know if there is anyone else involved. There 90% is though, girls don't do moving on unless they got somewhere to go to.
[Edited on 30-07-2012 by Colin]
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C2RL R
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Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
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Sorry mate but I think it's over. She laid the foundations for the relationship when it started and she knows it. No way would she be feeling like it was going nowhere as it was her terms anyway. If she wanted to carry it on then she would have asked if you wanted to step it up a notch and be more exclusive. Sounds like all that was an excuse. She either wants to be single or has met someone IMO.
I hope I'm wrong and it works out though mate. If not then it wasn't meant to be.
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VrsTurbo
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Registered: 8th Jun 10
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
She's probably met someone else who makes her feel important and wanted and made her evaluate her cosy relationship as toxic and loveless.
Immature young girls desperately crave attention, texts every 5 minutes and a whole mannor of other nonsense sadly so i'm afraid unless she regains her marbles quickly then it's over old chap!! Just hope you've not been bladed by anyone you know if there is anyone else involved. There 90% is though, girls don't do moving on unless they got somewhere to go to.
[Edited on 30-07-2012 by Colin]
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RichR
Premium Member
Registered: 17th Oct 01
Location: Waterhouses, Staffordshire
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quote:
Originally posted by VrsTurbo
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
She's probably met someone else who makes her feel important and wanted and made her evaluate her cosy relationship as toxic and loveless.
Immature young girls desperately crave attention, texts every 5 minutes and a whole mannor of other nonsense sadly so i'm afraid unless she regains her marbles quickly then it's over old chap!! Just hope you've not been bladed by anyone you know if there is anyone else involved. There 90% is though, girls don't do moving on unless they got somewhere to go to.
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Russ
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Registered: 14th Mar 04
Location: Armchair
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she's met somebody else who tells her how wonderful she is and how he would treat her different and you probably don't do that, sorry mate.
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SetH
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Registered: 15th Jul 01
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
She's probably met someone else who makes her feel important and wanted and made her evaluate her cosy relationship as toxic and loveless.
Immature young girls desperately crave attention, texts every 5 minutes and a whole mannor of other nonsense sadly so i'm afraid unless she regains her marbles quickly then it's over old chap!! Just hope you've not been bladed by anyone you know if there is anyone else involved. There 90% is though, girls don't do moving on unless they got somewhere to go to.
So fucking true!!!
I have had this happen a few times. Girlfriend Stealers TBH, you know that guy that is always lurking in the background for them to 'talk to about things'. 
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RichR
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Registered: 17th Oct 01
Location: Waterhouses, Staffordshire
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I think in a lot of cases, the guy probably doesn't even know. Normally someone they meAt through work/hobbies too so you have no idea that its building
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SetH
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Registered: 15th Jul 01
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Yep!
The way I look at this is that I obviously failed as a boyfriend in the past if they went off with said gfriend stealers 
To the OP, as hard as it might be you need to move on. Things will never be the same now, even if she has a change of heart it will only be temporary.
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RichR
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Registered: 17th Oct 01
Location: Waterhouses, Staffordshire
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I don't think that's the case, I think most girls assume that the grass is greener. You could have a perfect relationship and they;d still strive for something different. As with the OP, her previous ex was controlling, the OP was the opposite; chalk and cheese but you can guarantee nothing will ever be good enough
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K2 GTi
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Registered: 21st Oct 04
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I feel for you mate, had a similar thing happen to me the last couple of days. It's sorted itself though, but it does sound like she's met someone else. My missis prob has at work, but I'm yet to find out. I'm gonna see how the next few weeks go.
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mwg
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Registered: 19th Feb 04
Location: South Lakes
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Rapidly coming to the conclusion that life is shit
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Baskey
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Registered: 31st May 06
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She's probely on the blob mate, she will be fine next week.
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Brett
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Registered: 16th Dec 02
Location: Manchester
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quote:
Originally posted by mwg
Rapidly coming to the conclusion that life is shit
It is if you take onboard everything you read on CS 
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mwg
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Registered: 19th Feb 04
Location: South Lakes
User status: Offline
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True
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K2 GTi
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Registered: 21st Oct 04
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I honestly blame facebook and social media for this kind of shit. Females want attention so bad an will do anything to get it.
Whores the lot of them. I'm gonna try find a gf next who hasn't got Facebook - which is near on impossible?
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mwg
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Registered: 19th Feb 04
Location: South Lakes
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Yeah good luck with that one!
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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These girls need a role model and not some plastic bimbo off Geordie Shore or Towie to fantasise about being!
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Ian W
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Registered: 8th Nov 03
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by K2 GTi
I honestly blame facebook and social media for this kind of shit. Females want attention so bad an will do anything to get it.
Whores the lot of them. I'm gonna try find a gf next who hasn't got Facebook - which is near on impossible?
This, constant need to feel wanted and told there fit. With social media there is always someone waiting to jump in.
Living in 2012 is hard work
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